As we head toward the closure of the cycle of 2019 I wanted to say a heartfelt thank you. I hope it’s been a year to remember for all the right reasons.

Each year unfolds as a progression of personal and collective ‘Rituals’ (Rites). A calendar in and of itself reflects a ritual. If not already begun this is for many a time of Christmas centred ritual; for others, less so.

Ritual is an integral part of personal and collective experience. It shows up in some way in all our behavioural patterns. There is some form of personal ritual happening as we clean and dress ourselves, make a cuppa or eat a meal. There is some form of ritual (rite) going on in every interaction and gathering.

Yet the value of ritual stems not so much from the form, but in the intention in which it is conceived and engaged. In turn, the quality of our intention depends on the quality of our mindfulness.

Mindfulness has heart centred intention and conveys a frequency of energy that is sharable Now... Self serving intention does not.

This means ritual can be a mindful reinforcement of ‘Now moment’ connectedness. Or; it can be used to project separation, based on past judgments and reinforce future division.

It is the choice (intention) held by each individual that adds to or subtracts from the collective experience. I’m sure we have all experienced the difference on many occasions.

The end of every cycle is a phase of contraction – a time to wind down inwardly before a new phase of expansion. 2019 has been a tumultuous time in so many ways. 2020 promises to be even more so!

Until then, wishing you Christmas rituals filled with heart-mind felt happiness…

Giving to Receive?

Hello fellow explorers,

If you are anything like me, trying to find the balance between giving and receiving has been a lifelong journey.

To find balance asks questions of us in so many ways. In every moment of interaction whether through relationship; work; recreation; creative expression or otherwise, others are asking to receive. What one feels able to give often seems limited. There are so many permutations of how to be – what to say and do in a particular situation. News feeds stream a litany of instances of imbalance. It can all feel so overwhelmingly tempting to just focus on #1!

Yet when all is said and done, giving and receiving are sides of the same coin. The Giving<>Receiving principle is simply an expression of the ‘Feminine<>Masculine Principle’. This is the magnetic feminine principle and electric masculine principle of life force energy.

The balance of this principle is found in the equilibrium of the unified Source Field. It is the dynamic balance between contractive being and expansionary becoming that enables the dance of ever inter-changing configurations of the particles, atoms, elements and molecules of matter.

More tangibly it is in the eco systems of the natural world. It is in the co2 we breathe out and the o2 we breathe in. It is in the balance of our blood pressure. It is in the contraction and expansion of our joints and in our hands that open and shut in a daily ritual of giving and receiving. It is at the heart of every human experience, bar none. It arises in our every relationship transaction. It is in the active and the passive aspects of communication – our verbal and non verbal speaking and listening.

Yet how much are we really aware of this in our everyday life?  Although we most consciously give and receive physically, emotionally and mentally; balance must also be found at the existential or Soul level of being. One might read or hear of ‘spiritual’ sayings such as ‘it is in giving that we receive’ or ‘you can’t out give the universe’… Yet everyday ‘role models’ are hard to find. It is easier to think ‘that’s sounds true’ and move on to something else!

Most of us experience some imbalance between Giving and Receiving. It may be big it may be small. We like to give but feel hesitant to receive. Or we like to receive but have a resistance to giving.

Ultimately imbalance only arises through Separation Perception. This occurs through feeling disconnected from Soul center. Separation Perception is fear based. We fear to fully give of ourselves and we fear to fully receive from others.

This drives the attachments we have to most everything about ourselves and lives. The outcomes we want are generally predicated on attachments. We are attached to having what we want. We are attached to not being without what we want! The cost is high, for attachment is central to every experience of frustration, anger, disappointment, pain, despair, depression…

The great paradox is that the Giving<>Receiving principle reflects the state of the unified Source Field; one of ‘non-attachment’. So the less Attachment we have to giving – the more fulfilling it is. The less resistance (Attachment) to receiving – the more fulfilling it is.

Balance in Giving<>Receiving can only arise from balanced intention. This balance arises through being mind-fully present to what is happening ‘Now’. Only this allows inner guidance from Soul Center to flow through the ‘Now’ moment.

What this might look like in a particular situation cannot be pre-determined. That would indicate attachment! Yet if we were to eschew any theology and focus only on finding balance in Giving<>Receiving it would represent a complete spiritual practice in itself.

So as we approach that time of year when expectations of Giving<>Receiving seem particularly emphasized, it is of great value to quietly reflect on how we feel about it.

Next time you are talking to someone, you might notice how you are in speaking versus listening. Next time you buy or receive something, you might notice how your mind subtly evaluates the Giving<>Receiving equation. What constitutes value for money may not be what constitutes value for you? The energy of Giving<>Receiving Equilibrium is the unconditional state of perfect ‘share-ability’. We might well find the real joy comes not from what’s under the gift wrapping but simply through the share-ability of a heartfelt moment with another.

Till next time…

Hello fellow explorers,

Why is it, that life experiences can ‘think’ right but ‘feel’ wrong?

So much of our lives can be taken up with trying to reconcile what seem like irreconcilable conflicts between our thoughts and feelings.

In the often intense contrast of experience in the human collective and our greater natural world context, it is impossible not to have strong emotion come up that can feel overwhelming at times. When this happens we have to find a way to restore balance. We usually do this by finding a way to rationalise what we are feeling.This is not always successful and on closer inspection it is often the case that something can think right but not feel quite right. Or, it can be the other way around. Something can feel completely right, yet may seem not quite, ‘er’… rational!

There are teachings I have explored that say the spiritual path is about learning to subdue or repress ones feelings in order to strengthen the mind. Having arrived in a ‘stiff upper lip’ era, I found that instruction to have served me poorly. Indeed I have come to realize there is a nuance to this that renders almost the opposite to be correct!

This is what I have found to be true for me. We all know that electricity (Energy) is electro-magnetic. This gives rise to what I like to call the inseparable Feminine-Masculine Principle. The magnetic aspect of Energy is its ‘Feminine Principle’; the electric aspect, its ‘Masculine Principle’. Everything we perceive of in Form (matter) is composed of Energy. We too are composed of fundamental particles, atomic and elemental Frequencies of Life Force Energy. We each have a unique Human Energy Field that is fundamentally interconnected with a Singular Source Energy Field. 

The equilibrium in the Feminine-Masculine Principle is the reason for the homeostasis that we enjoy as our balance of wellbeing. This is found in the contraction-expansion, the giving-receiving that occurs through the ‘in’ and ‘out’ breath and throughout the functioning of our cells, organs and systems.  Whilst homeostasis exists ‘autonomic-ally’ in our ‘nature’ such as through that aspect of our nervous system, we have to play our part by maintaining it. This requires ‘nurturing’ ourselves on a physical level. Yet just as (and perhaps even more importantly) it depends on us maintaining a state of emotional and mental balance.

The indivisible Feminine-Masculine Principle of Energy is both tangible (linear) and intangible (abstract). It is found in the rational-intuitive left-right hemispheres of the brain and in our more tangible experience of thought-feeling. The indivisibility of this principle also offers a big paradox for us to experience: Thoughts that feel and feelings that think! The epicentre of the equilibrium of thought-feeling is the Soul Centre. It is here that the Master Sense resides and our Inner Guidance system flows. It is this that enables us to ‘make holistic sense’ of our physical, emotional and mental levels of sensory experience.

The relationship between emotional and mental states represents our ‘psycho-emotional mindset. This works fine when we are in alignment with Soul Centre but not if we are feeling disconnected, shut down and lost in a ‘Something-Nothing mindset’. This produces ‘Separation Perception’: A belief of ‘me’ as a ‘Something’ disconnected from ‘you’ in a world beyond which is ‘Nothing’

Separation Perception produces Polarities on every level of experience and very tangibly as Thought-Feeling Polarity. Polarities represent a seemingly unbridgeable ‘gap’ between me’ and Soul Centre’! It is this ‘gap’ that produces the underlying sense of lack—the ‘Emptiness’ we may experience as a subtle and inexplicable anxiety within our being. 

We don’t like to feel because of this Emptiness and its­­­­ many expressions such as unworthiness, guilt, shame and the lack of real meaning and purpose to life that is central to what increasingly is generically described as ‘mental illness’.  We may try to rationalize it; to ‘think it away’ through our attachments to Separation Perception by seeing it as a ‘fault’ in another. Yet as thoughts and feelings are inseparable, it is not possible just to ‘think our way’ into Thought-Feeling balance without also having to process what we are feeling.

 Emptiness based feelings are our ‘calling’ to return to Soul Centre. Ultimately it is only through processing the feeling of the discomfort of Emptiness that allows the restoration of the equilibrium of Soul Centre and the flow of Inner Guidance.  It is here the equilibrium (homeostasis) of Thought-Feeling balance can be found. This is what meditation, mindfulness and ‘detachment’ oriented practices are all about. For it is only in this equilibrium that the elusive state of being called ‘peace’ can be experienced.

The real fast track to ‘peace’ is by surrendering into what we are feeling rather than what we are thinking. So if outwardly sitting in that ‘lotus position’ is not your way, sink into it inwardly by deeply acknowledging what you are feeling, rather than ‘think-pushing’ it away. It is perfectly okay to feel the way you do. Indeed, the greatest gift of self healing you can ever receive is to profoundly acknowledge how you are feeling ‘warts and all’ and permit yourself to be – exactly as you are Now!

This offering may not think right. It may feel too hard… for it may call you to examine your attachment to long held beliefs about yourself and others that no longer serve your Soul path. Yet, what I can promise is that the ‘pay off’ for so doing will both feel and think right!  Until next time… Love, Andrew

The most wonderful, yet also most challenging thing about being human is being in relationship. Whilst we all in our own way seek greater connection with ‘others’, we are often frustrated and confounded by differences that seem to inhibit or even prevent it.

These are generally differences in perception. For as we each interpret our sensory experience in our own unique way, we develop our own unique set of values, beliefs and attitudes, that form our perception of individual and collective reality.
Where perception is based in a belief of a ‘me’ existing separately and opposed to ‘you’, it produces a perception of ‘me-self’ as a ‘Something’ in a world beyond which is an intangible ‘Nothing’.

Yet behind the scenes, the Singular Source Field, the ‘Everything’ we are fundamentally a unique ‘something’ of, is an unconditional state of non-Attachment. It cannot place conditions on itself because there is nothing outside of it! It cannot judge. It is a state of perfect inclusivity which is why it is truly described as ‘Unconditional Love’.

The ‘Everything’ is ‘analogical’. It is ‘One minded’. Yet Something-Nothing perception is a binary based mind-set that seems to split the Unconditional Love of ‘Everything’ into a Polarity of Love and lack of Love.

The ‘love’ end of the Polarity is the Unconditional Love that as a part of ‘Everything’ is our birthright but which through Something-Nothing perception, seems lost to us. The lack of Love is the fear of the ‘nothing’ beyond the ‘something’ we perceive. It is the sense of disconnection, the uneasy anxiety and pervading sense of ‘Emptiness’ of there being something missing in our lives, that renders our experiences less than fulfilling.

More simply, the ‘love’ end of the Polarity is the Unconditional Love we need because of this Emptiness. The lack of love is the fear based Emptiness that we project outward onto others, to get rid of it! The ‘Love’ and ‘lack of love’ (fear) Polarity, is also a ‘Love-Hate Polarity’. Love represents the love we desire. Hate represents the lack of love we want to avoid.

The Something-Nothing mindset is conditional. We both love and hate our own selves. We can be narcissistic and self destructive in equal measure, because we do not unconditionally accept ourselves. As Something-Nothing perception attributes the ‘cause’ of every experience as separate from its ‘effect’ on us, we seem to have to bargain with each other for Love. The bargaining chip is relief from the lack of love.

Because Something-Nothing perception is conditional and therefore exclusive as opposed to the inclusivity of Unconditional Love, any who fail to keep their up their Love end of the bargain can instantly be attributed Hate. So, relationships based in Something-Nothing perception fall into two categories: there are those we love (fear) to love and those we love to hate (fear). As this can happen time and again within the same relationship, it is the essence of what we call the ‘love-hate relationship’!

A Something-Nothing mindset is ‘self serving’. There can be no real connection or intimacy in relationship based in this mind-set, because our ‘fear to love’, our desire to stay separate countermands our desire for love (connection).
We fear to be truly vulnerable. We fear real connection and intimacy because we fear that others may see in-to-me!
Notwithstanding, the quantum physics of the Everything, Source Field is that it is inherently ‘self sharing’. This is the essence of unconditional connectivity and intimacy.

So, as we are all inseparable aspect of the interconnected self sharing ‘Everything’ we are not here just to be a self serving ‘something’. We are all here to be self sharing in our own unique way. It is our true Destiny to find and express–to share–our own unique expression of Unconditional Love.

We cannot escape relationship. It is an immutable part of life. Every relationship offers enormous contrast in terms of our experience and perceptions of it. The great challenge for all of us is to see this contrast as purely one of an experience that each can grow and expand from.

To become authentically self sharing in relationship is to mindfully follow the impulse of our inner guiding Master Sense. For in every moment this teaches and guides us along the way of transcending our fear to love. Only inner guidance carries the vital inner discernment required to unlock and get the best out of every relationship experience and in so doing explore new levels of connection, harmony and fulfillment. We have only to pay attention!

Developing better relationships starts right NOW. It does not require that we change anyone else. It is not anyone else’s job to make us happy. It is our own job to find a way within all our relationships to make ourselves happy!
It simply involves some inner ‘baby steps’, a little inner contemplation of those relationships we are finding most challenging. The first one to look at is the one we have with our own self. For until I can truly accept and share ‘me’, I cannot connect, accept or receive sharing from ‘you’.

The greatest barrier to relationship is the desire to be right and make another wrong that stems from Love-Fear (Hate) Polarity. Hanging on to old resentments, hoping for restitution or apology that may never happen is a warning sign of Something-Nothing based attachments and expectations. It is stuck energy better spent on just letting the past go, clearing the state and beginning a whole new way and life of relationship, NOW.

For a refresh on how relationship conflict recycles itself, check out my bold piece on the Inner-Outer Critic.  Have a question on a particular issue? Email me through my CONTACT page.

Until next time… Happy relating!